making an orchid planter
Yep, I did it, I bought an orchid from IKEA. For $9.99. I had pretty low expectations of it surviving, because I don't think quality when I think IKEA. I think streamlined. And orchids are anything but streamlined. They're more like high-maintenance supermodels with needs like endless supplies of cocaine and cash. But if I had a gorgeous supermodel girlfriend, how could I possibly say no to anything she "needed"? So I took my high-maintenance orchid home. And immediately realized that it had needs. Like a very specific pot with vent holes for its roots that like to be damp – yet aired.
So like anyone would, I put everything else aside to make the perfect pot for its perfect roots. Because my orchid was going to be happy with me – forever and ever.
Plus, time was of the essence. My orchid was definitely not going to wait around for me to mess around with design considerations. It wanted what it wanted. Yesterday. So I scribbled an idea on a piece of paper and got to work: I rolled a slab, formed the shape around a bucket, then poked the air holes with the handle of a pen-tool. Done.
I'm actually happy with the results because it's, well, streamlined. And best of all, it should keep my orchid happy . . . As long as I provide the proper humidity, keep the daytime temperature between 65 and 75 degrees and the nighttime temperature a few degrees cooler, keep it in the sun, but not too much sun, make sure it has gentle air circulation and proper fertilization, and don't forget that it prefers ice in its water . . .
So where's that supermodel girlfriend?